Learning the Language of Love
Today I was thinking how we’re almost through January. After the holidays are over, and after the big New Years comes and goes sometimes we can be left feeling… well, we can be left feeling a lot of feelings.
We don't have to look to hard to see messages of “New Year, New You.” It's usually gyms trying to sell memberships, or meal kits wanting to sell you a diet plan.
Just as the New Year comes I want to remind you what 2 Corinthians 5:17 says, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” You are a new creation: no gym membership or diet plan required.
When we become a new creation we get to shed off the old, and we have so much permission to learn how to live in a new way. It takes time to learn new things, and you get to take all the time you need.
Part of growing into a new creation is learning a new language: The Language of Love.
The language of love takes time to learn, and takes practice to become natural. When we learn something new it take 400 to 600 repetitions to create new synapse in our brain. That means if you've been speaking the language of shame and judgement for many years, it is perfectly normal if it takes you time to learn the language of love.
When learning the this new language I encourage you to start with validation and compassion.
Validation is the key that opens the door for compassion to get in. Validation can sound like, “I see that you are having a hard time. It makes sense why you are feeling frustrated.” It lets out heart feel seen in the pain we are experiencing, rather that shoving it down.
When we push down out pain, it doesn't disappear. Its gets stored in our bodies and comes our later its lots of different unfun ways.
Compassion follows validation and says, “I will not remove love from you. You are valuable to me, and I will sit with you in your pain. You have so much permission to learn new things and can take all the time you need.
If you are curious what Compassion sounds like, you can start with Galatians 5:22-23, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” Compassion sounds like Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, etc.
It takes time to learn a new language, and the good news is that you are loved right now while you're are learning. You don't have to wait till you're on the other side to be loved.
As you start of this new year, I want you to know that you are a new creation, one who is ridiculously loved.
Ready to learn the Language of Love for yourself?
